Welcome and Introduction

I guess in a first blog post you should tell others about yourself and explain why you wanted to blog in the first place. I am a 6'1'' 25 year old 3rd year Law Student who weighs 467lbs and needs to lose it. I want to create this site to try to create some accountability and some transparency into my weight problem. It is easy to shut everyone out of your struggles and create a facade of happiness. Actually it is not really a facade, I am happy in a lot of ways. I am married to a beautiful, intelligent and supportive wife. I am about to finish law school. All in all my life is good.

What I mean by a facade of happiness is that when you are large, you always think about it; not like a stalker or a drug addict. I mean your mind often slips and thinks, "I am the largest person in the room", "I am really tired from walking up those stairs" and so forth.

I have always struggled with my weight I have lost 50+ lbs two previous times in my past but have always gained even more back. I am not sure what character, physiological or mental defect I have that will not allow me to be a normal weight with even relative ease. I have blamed everything for it my genetics, my parents, my upbringing, my country, and of course myself. I have even tried to blame my wife once or twice which I know is totally absurd as I was very large when we got married.

I think at this point I am not blaming anyone. No one wanted me this way; no one wants me to be unhealthy; no one made me eat another portion. I don't even believe blaming myself is the answer I don't think I am stupid or weak or challenged in a way that most people are. I ate because I was hungry and did not care to think about the consequences of indiscriminate eating. Many people like me just don't/didn't think. We know and knew that eating too many calories would make us like this and we decided to just eat without thinking.

This first blog entry is my pledge to think, not only to think but to act on conscious efforts to get healthy. I will exercise and eat right (80% of the time), and I will lose all of the weight I need. Please help hold me accountable on this journey.